Thursday, January 31, 2008
{ 3:02 AM }
you said you dont love me as much as what you used to be.
and all you said was sorry sorry and more sorrys.
if only saying sorry mend everything, i'd hope it will reduce the love for you.
if only saying sorry could go back, i'd hope friday never happen.
you said its unfair for me.
i said you should put yourself into my shoes, like i did, putting myself in yours.
i know i was too harsh.
you said that once i set my mind for something, no matter what, i wont change.
i ask you, you said you cant get over friday's. youre just the same as me. once the mindset is there, you wont change.
im upset that friday's turned everything upside down.
im upset cause this shows your love wasnt strong.
im just very upset.
History repeats itself.
The one before, hurt me left. Then you came, and hurt me right.
The one before, places we went, things we did, was on the left.
You, places we went, things we did, was on the right.
Bishan's Coffee Bean, Macs, Bus interchange.
The Hereen, Cathy cineleisure, Moive theatre 4 Last Row, the walk from Hereen to Wisma's Food Republic, the walk from Wisma to Takashimaya, from Takashimaya to Wheelock, from Wheelock to Forum to Orchard Parade Hotel to Tanglin Mall.
The Bus 54 back to Bishan.
The phone calls.
The smses.
The msn conversations.
The plans for after 19Feb.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
{ 10:27 PM }
I remember every touch, every flower, every word you ever said
I remember how we looked at each other the very first time we met
I’ll never forget
I remember every smile, every letter, every kiss you gave to me
How we'd talk and you'd hold me for hours until I’d fall fast asleep
You said you would always be there should I need your arms around me
But now that I’ve fallen to my knees, I don't think you give a damn about me
And it feels like we're running out of time
And it feels like I’m the last thing on your mind
I can touch your skin, I can hear you breathe
Baby will you tell me what's wrong
Cause it feels like you're already gone
Did you leave in the middle of the night and forget to say goodbye?
Did you feel it was time to go but you didn't want to see me cry?
It's harder and harder for me to believe you still love me
Get on with it baby if you're gonna leave
It’s not worth saving
And it feels like we're running out of time
And it feels like I’m the last thing on your mind
I can touch your skin, I can hear you breathe
Baby will you tell me what's wrong
Cause it feels like you're already gone
My heart is telling me it’s too late to beg you to stay
You wouldn’t hear me anyway
And it feels like we're running out of time
And it feels like I’m the last thing on your mind
I can touch your skin, I can hear you breathe
Baby will you tell me what's wrong
Cause it feels like you're already gone
{ 9:10 PM }
you called first thing in the morning to ask me about her.
thanks i appreciate it.
Chin Mu Yang called when i was on the way to school, saying that i counted the dough trays wrongly and i didnt top up the cheese container for today's morning.
Running nose and a fever halfway through the test. Canteen 4 for lunch and conversation with Thomas about sleeping pills. Overdosage kills.
Maths test after lunch was hard for me to concentrate as the noodles that i had made me uncomfortable plus the running fever in me. But well, as least i know how to get the 1st 2nd and 3rd part 1 question solve. Lol. steps are there but answers wrong.
AEL lessons was next. Was paying attention for first 45mins of the lessons but outta sudden i broke down and cried. sliently.
Supposed to meet CATS group for meeting but Shiyan said i looked very pale and not advisable to stay. Lol. And in the bus on the way back, outta sudden i cried, again. Seriously i dont know what the fcuk happened to me. thoughts of you and me and everything keeps playing and playing and playing.
Painkillers to stop the pain.
And you just msned me to not emo. Like hello, im human. i have feelings. I know you can get over it that fast, but i cant.
i told you im not emoing and all you said was Good(:
is that all you can say? I tell you now, i need reassurance. I bet you didnt know how upset i was yesterday. All you said was asking me about her. I know she's not involved in this and we got her pulled in. i ask you now, who is majority involved? both of us. ah nevermind. its just that to you, i became invisible and im not the one who broke down, its just you and her.
I said i had painkillers and im gona rest so talk later. you asked if its prescribed, i said i have my ways to get it. you told me not to hurt myself and dont hurt people around me, to hurt you if i want. Let me speak, firstly, nothing hurts more than of your sudden decision. and its not about hurting each other. its kinda like a flexibilty, reassurance, understanding kind of thing.
Hah. Like he will give a damn about it now.
how i wished friday really never happened.
{ 1:23 AM }
shucks. this song was played when i did closing just now.
now im super fcuking pissed with myself. i wished last friday was never a history nor a present.
everything now in my life are so screwed.
its all fated that history are bound to repeat itself.
Sigh. This someone said he will help me with my German presentation tmr. eh i mean like few hours later cause its tuesday already. then this something happened. and i was msning with him that im going to do my german ppt. all he said was good luck. yes he forgot. Nevermind cause i bet he forgot.
i have 2 tests straight for later. and 2 presentations undone. and i have to submit like quite a number of online assignments and written assignments.
and my hopes on appealing were crushed.
on a side note, im glad that Mdm Tay forgave me for something seriously bad i did to her.
Exams are coming and the mugging mood isnt with me.
kill me someone.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
{ 1:43 AM }
GLs trainings are always the dosage to get me going in times of being stress in studying.
SW VB competition made me missed another GLs training. and met up with TEHs for dinner at Bukit Timah Market. 4 new Tehs added to The TEHs. TEH KOH, TEH PAN, TEH C and TEH C PLUS. and finally found someone whose is TEH KOH. (which sounds like teh kor aka underwear in hokkien). Lol. Nevermind its a inside joke anyway.
The walk to BTM was super noisy, with new scandals created by Kino, Teh Sheng the sexy girl with hairband.
Andy, Shaun, Ernest and Bush joined us too. Dinner was a extremely funny conversation with Achmed and Peter Parker. Kino resembles Achmed like 99.99%. Haha! Eyebrows yaw.
and the creation of Zoe's 12th clap.
No matter what, i love TEHS deep deep muacks muacks XOXO. (:
Thursday's late afternoon was a misty business with Bon.
Watched The Mist at Cineleisure. Rated 6/10.
The Mist its a very simple title for a complex and intriguing tale that's more about humanity than a bunch of monsters, with a little zest of a political streak but not enough to politicize every moment which the horrible far-out experiments that went murderously wrong, hence the creation of bloodthirsty monsters.
The film itself is kinda absorbing, but by the time the ending arrives, you may be willing to cut it a break, as I was, even if Thomas jane’s nervy decision cuts the audience no break whatever. Bang!
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
{ 1:45 AM }
class was at 9am for foong wai tuck's lecture.
lunch at canteen 4 with classmates with "inside incident"
maths e-quiz during Engineering Maths2.
saw TEH HO at level 5.
heavy downpour during AEL class.
Canteen 2 with Mag, Trey and Haikal. Adora and Tecksheng came later. Then Luyee and Ho.
Went up to level 2 with them for SSC interview and was the 2nd group of threes for that. With Trey and Kino. and yes, i screwed the interview up, kinda. Brain cant think clearly of what to say. Gawd. AHH. Words i said were all scattered, and now that i have a slight memory of what happened was that i didnt form a proper sentence for questions. not even one. shucks. All that i can do now is to hope for the best of best for results.
After interview, rushed to German class for written test and role play.
Monday, January 14, 2008
{ 1:18 AM }
the disappointment.
then the crazyness
this looked like. bridegroom and the bride. with two bridemaids infront.
Lol.
the day before, 30Dec. Amanda and me went AMK Hub to watch Warlords.
The movie evokes such Hollywood blockbusters as Gladiator etc. With the its deft blending of epic action sequences(with brutal war scene) and fluid story telling, it was highly recommended.
Jet Li performance, over Danny the Dog, in company of good actors like Andy Lau and Takeshi Kaneshiro. The warlords is really about one warlord, Jet Li's character as Pang. He is determined to rise up in ranks and become someone of importance. He is a heartless man in disguise and no hero. His character have no hesitation of values like, loyality, discipline, caring for poors in his bandits/soldiers and followers to assure their obedience, gradtitude to whom he rise into a position of great power. In the end his faith is sealed, because, as a couple of scheming mandarins tell, he doesnt understand politics. Breaking a vow and killing his trusted men make him weak, but he die without understanding and incapable to see past his blind determination. Andy Lau and Takeshi Kaneshiro make great roles as peasants turned to banditry in order to feed their family and later, the soldiers who show more compassion and self-discipline than Pang because they really believe in the ideals he taught them. This movie, based on Taiping rebellion have a line which defines China in those years of turmoil and death, the phrase his soldiers repeat to give themselves courage : For food! For gold ! For land ! But its not Pang fault, because the blame belongs to the puppeters who allowed famine, torture and robbery in order to push their agenda a level up.
Anyway, this moive aint the make-you-think-indepth kind of movie.
Did i hear Boring? Lol!.
Till then, period.
German Role play, written test and project presentation!
MDCAD drawings!
Engineering Mechanics tutorials!
Monday, January 07, 2008
{ 7:04 PM }
this post was due way back to 2007 Christmas.
2 weeks before xmas, i was spending my time with brownies at Raffles Xchange.
Never-ending-pre-orders, irritating lunch crowders, customer's delaying of time resulted in jams. inconsiderate 'office-bank-people' telling us about cheaper price for coporate sales cause they already told our boss blah blah yada yada, taking their sweet time to come to a decision when theres like a whole bunch of people waiting to be served.
and in one incident where one company, some-office-bank-people came to me. asking me to get a original brownie for them, then when making payment, they asked for coporate prices and im like 'uhm, which company are you from?' *name of company to be kept confidential here*
they: "from The Company. can charge coporate prices cause i called Mahn Ling." and i turned to my other side, like Mahn Ling? she's just beside me, and her phone just rang and she's talking to the phone.
LOL.
and even some dumb questions were by customers like, "how to eat?" "my friend dont know how to eat."
like DUH open your mouth and eat lah dey.
and because the brownies we sold were in boxes and ribbons were tied to it. and when customer wanted this brownie, and we take it out from the fridge, packed in the bag then some will go like, "I dont want this ribbon, i want the other colour one." OR
"I dont want this ribbon i want the other box", when in this case, both ribbons are in the same colour. like wth, i can retie the ribbon for you right. choose here and there. some even want the one right inside the fridge, cause its like the display fridge kind, the right inside one will be the first display one infront.
okay. stop here for that.
23Dec, 5-1 Gathering at Sean's place.
Went AMK Hub before meeting Mag, and saw Jaime Bouncee, Peien OP and Ziying BO! Reached Sean's place around 630pm. Maisarah and Suria was there! B.O.J, Xinghua, Jaime Peien Ziying, Zenda, Baoru and Hadi. and Abraham brought his Girlfriend. (: HweeHoon, Wendy, Marcus, Wen Chieh, Yvonne came later. We started eating around 730 and played musical chairs, giant and elf. and used baoru's professional camera for cam-whoring.
24Dec, i met up with Mag, Adora and Jin to countdown XMAS yo!
(:
Mag and i reached orchard earlier then Adora and Jin, so we just follow the crowd and walk and walk and walk. we walked from the other orchard exit, to the back of wisma, then takashimaya then to taka's front. stopped at the phone booth outside taka and saw Kongaik. Thereafter, continue walking. and it was fate cause me and mag, adora and jin walked past wach other, in the extremly crowded place.
idiot haziq lim called and laughed cause im at orchard. and he said dont call him if i get molested or rape. i said i have nothing to get molested. then blah blah, he starting emoing. talking emo on the phone.
Got the crazy ribbons and Jin kept spraying at the "opposition bangalas". He was then sprayed by his group of friends he met there. And walking to cineleisure, overcoming from the crazy ribbons war all around, i saw someone running towards me. It was Joey. Anderson's 4-3'06 Joey. then i saw Siwee. Lol. Mag and me, of course, attack them with the crazy ribbons.
Left town around 130am, 2am and headed to Jin's place. Stayed till 12noon and Home Sweet Home for more rest.
(:
